I’m seeing a disturbing trend in the blogosphere and on social media. Anyone else noticing a disgusting amount of vitriol being spewed at fellow members of the romance/publishing world? I am, and I don’t like it.

For the past few years I’ve bragged about our supportive, women dominated, and highly financially successful industry to outsiders. Don’t make me eat my words.

Yes, there was an author talking about her contracts and her royalty statements from her traditional publisher. She was sharing HER experience. I found it fascinating and plan on using her information to ask the right questions before signing any contracts with any publisher.

And yes, there was an agent who responded to her post, sharing his view on self-publishing. Again, HIS view. Free country, people. He should be allowed to post his opinion freely, and YOU should be allowed to post your dissenting opinion. All good. However, it’s not good when people are gleefully mocking and measuring success when the agent removes the post due to the nasty comments.

I heard Robyn Carr speak a few weeks ago, and one of the things she said was that 90 percent of success in this industry was showing up, writing a good book and being nice. You hear me? BEING NICE. I’m NOT saying be a pushover or a doormat. I’m in this game to make money and earn my living whether through traditional means or indie pubbing. I will question my agent, my contracts, my royalty statements and so forth, but I try to do so in a professional manner.

Now I’m going to get a little religious, feel free to click away…

A little Kabbalah lesson for the morning…When God created the earth, He put his essence into a vessel which filled with his light, righteousness and goodness and holiness. Unfortunately, the vessels couldn’t contain the essence, cracked and spilled the light across the planet during creation. Our job, while here on earth is to gather up those bits of light and make the jars whole again. (Tikkun, repair)

Once you spill darkness to cover the light, its out there, and your bit of vitriol and negative energy is free, there is no gathering it back.

(Author’s note: I am too young to have studied more than bits and pieces of Kabbalah, so if I totally messed up the lesson, let me know)

I went to the Washington Romance Writer’s retreat a little while back. It was a fabulous time, as always.  At the retreat we have a table set up where authors can leave out promotional items. We also have goody bags to which authors and publishers donate.

The author table was filled with lovely bookmarks, cover flats and other gorgeous full-cover items. And the goody bag was chock full of the like.

I admired all of it, and for the first time since being published felt a little lame that I had nothing on the table. As a digital author, I’ve never seen the need for bookmarks. But still, it felt unprofessional not to have anything.

And so now that I have a new book coming out soon, I’m wondering what should I do to promote it? I have all the social media covered. And I plan on blogging etc.. but do I want to pay a printer to make something beautiful as a keepsake? I’m very very tempted. I’m not convinced they sell books though. I don’t think a pretty bookmark has ever made anyone buy a book, so is it the best traction for my limited marketing budget. I don’t know.

And so I throw the question out to you as readers. What works? Sample chapter booklets? Bookmarks? Postcards? Trading cards? Or is it more about having your cover out there and hoping the visual and author name stick in someone’s subconscious?

I’ve never reviewed a movie on my blog before, and this probably won’t be much of a review either. But last night I saw Avengers (along with everyone else in the US) and had some thoughts.

A few years back I took my first fiction writing course. The teacher warned us to think long and hard before embarking on the fiction writing journey, “because we’d never be able to see or enjoy a movie the same way.” Last night I finally reached that point. I’d wanted to see Avengers because of all the hoopla and I love a good superhero flick. Plus lots of my respected author friends were Facebooking that they loved the movie.

But I didn’t. Love it, that is. And I’m struggling to pinpoint why.

Things to love.

1. Male eye candy.

2. hilarious zingers from RDJ- “Hold on tight, Legolas”

3. Loki calling ScarJo a “Quim” I was the ONLY person in the theater who understood the meaning. I guess that’s how you get away with calling someone a cunt in a PG-13 movie.

4. Stan Lee’s cameo- Again, I think my husband and I were the only people who recognized him. (What theater did I go to? Clueless Cinemas?)

5. Special effects were fun

Things that made me go hmmm and roll my eyes:

1. Lack of true character motivation for the villains. “I am Loki and I want to rule the world. Bwa ha ha ha”  “We are power hungry alien dudes who want to conquer. Bow down earthlings!”

2. Shadowy super secret US government organization masterminding the superheros.

3. All action takes place in Manhattan. In about a 4 square block. And seriously New Yorkers, when there’s a massive invasion. STOP standing at the windows of your sky scrapers peering out. A spaceship/laser ray, tail of a dragon/etc… Will take facing of the building off in a massive crash and you’ll be killed. Sheesh woulda thought you’d learn by now. How many movies will it take.

4. And Aliens, if you’re all connected to the same power source, don’t leave the mothership vulnerable. Again, how many movie invasions will it take before you realize a superhero American will make the ultimate sacrifice (his life) to insert a nuclear device in your mothership thereby killing/shutting down all your soldiers?

Maybe I’m being curmudgeonly, but I’ve come to expect out-of-the-box plotting from Joss Wheedon. Instead Avengers is same old-same old.

What did you think? I know you saw the movie based on weekend box office numbers.

My son brought home the challenge homework last night. I should preface this by saying I’ve birthed a mathematical genius who sees the world in equations and can do complex calculations in his head that require a calculator for me. (he’s 7)

His fabulous teacher keeps him challenged by giving him different math homework that still works on the same skill. So if the class is learning to count by 2s, his homework is to count by 27s.

And he enjoys the math challenge and usually sails through them. But last night he was stumped. And I was stumped on how to explain it. There were a variety of obstacles in the way, the worst being that the worksheet wasn’t designed for a 7 year old’s handwriting. There simply wasn’t room for him to write 3 fractions without overlapping into the next problem set. And one problem of being a math genius is that you tend to be literal and a rule follower. His teacher hadn’t specifically said he could rewrite the math problems on graph paper, so he forced himself to try to squeeze his handwriting.

After 2 hours of working with him, I finally had enough. I needed to do the dishes and get the boys ready for dinner. So I called it. I know the teacher always gives the challenge homework with the caveat of do what you can, If it’s too hard, stop.

But my Tenacious J, refused to quit. He HAD to finish his homework. And I was torn. Was it okay to tell a kid to quit? Working through challenges builds life skills. Telling him it was okay to quit felt wrong on my tongue.

And I thought about all the unpublished writers out there, writing and struggling to get published. Some quit. It’s just too damn hard. But some don’t quit. They quit in a good way by putting a manuscript aside. Or querying a different publishing house. Or changing genres. Not quitting is what gains success. So the message today, is be like my son. If there’s something you want. DON’T QUIT. Don’t pound sand either, find a strategy. If over doesn’t work, dig a tunnel.

Have you ever quit or wanted to quit something. I have- and I can share that story later.